Status Is an Illusion

My Story Series

SHRM bought my book. I gave a talk at a national conference and had a book signing—both big milestones after five years of hard work and a prior successful career as a mental health therapist. It was a major moment.

But no one celebrated. One person even asked if I signed any books. I had—several. The highlight? A woman came to my session, book in hand, ready to engage. That meant everything.

At the book signing, once the crowd cleared, I greeted the man sitting next to me. His reaction? Shock—like I didn’t know who he was. I didn’t. Apparently, I was supposed to. His line was long. Mine wasn’t. I guess that made me invisible.

Here’s what I know now: I’m 55. I’ve dealt with hierarchy and status games for decades. But I’m done with that. If you can’t say hello, you’re not someone I need to learn from.

Insecurity doesn’t always look like shrinking. Sometimes it looks like ego. Superiority. Silence.

Be kind. Status is an illusion. We all come in the same way and we all leave the same way—without titles, accolades, or lines at tables.

Strip it all back. What matters is character. The rest is noise.